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求老友记中英文剧本
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch and Phoebe enters.]
【场景：中央公园，所有人都坐在长沙发上，菲比进入】
Phoebe: Hi
All: Hey! Hi!
Rachel: How was the honeymoon?
蜜月过的怎么样？
Phoebe; Oh, incredible! Oh! Champagne, candle-lit dinners, moonlight walks on the beach, it was sooo ro-man-tic!
哦，难以置信！哦，香槟，烛光晚餐，还有银色沙滩漫步，非常浪漫！
Rachel: Oh!
Chandler: So, where's Mike?
那，Mike在哪呢？
Phoebe: Oh, he's at the doctor, he didn't poop the whole time we were there!
哦，看病去了。我们度蜜月的时候他肚子总闹个没完。
Joey: Well anyway, I'm glad you're back, I really need your help.
唔，总之，很高兴你回来了，我正要你帮忙呢。
Phoebe: Oh, why? What's up?
哦，怎么啦，什么事儿？
Joey: I have an audition for this play and for some of it I have to speak French. Which, according to my résumé, I'm fluent in.
唔，我有个面试，剧本要求有些台词说法语，而我的简历里说我法语很流利。
Ross: Joey, you shouldn't lie on your résumé.
Joey，你不应该在简历里撒谎。
Monica: Yeah, you really shouldn't. (to Ross, sarcastically) By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
对呀，你真的不应该！哎，对了，你在开罗那一年的考古挖掘怎么样了？（讽刺）
Ross: (whispering) It was ok...
还行啦。
Rachel: I did not know you spoke French.
我怎么不知道你会说法语。
Phoebe: Oui, bien sur je parle Français! Qu'est-ce que tu penses alors?
Rachel: Oh... you're so sexy!
哦，你真性感。
Joey: Well, so, will you help me? I really wanna be in this play.
唔，那你愿意帮我的忙吗？我真的很想演这部戏。
Phoebe: Sure! Tout le plaisir est pour moi, mon ami.
当然愿意。
Rachel: Seriously stop it, or I'm gonna jump on ya.
说真的，别再说法语了，不然我就扑到你身上去了。
OPENING CREDITS
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment.]
【场景：摩尼卡和钱德的公寓】
Chandler: Hey.
Monica: Hey.
Chandler: Why are you wearing my apron?
你干吗穿着我的围裙？
Monica: I'm making cookies for Erica. And oh, by the way, we have to leave for the airport soon, her plane comes in about an hour.
我在给Erica做饼干。哦，对了，我们得快点儿去机场，她的飞机一小时后降落。
Chandler: Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"? (she's not amused) No? Divorce?
哦，嘿，那她到了以后，我能不能把你们俩介绍成我老婆和我孩子她妈？不行？离婚呢？
Ross: (he enters) Hey.
Monica: Hey.
Ross: You guys know where Rachel is?
嘿。你们知道Rachel在哪吗？
Monica: No, we haven't seen her since this morning.
不知道，从今天早上就没见着她。
Ross: So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)
难以置信！她半小时前就该带着Emma跟我碰头的。
Monica: Hey!
Ross: Hey!
Monica: These are for Erica!
这些是给Erica准备的！
Ross: What? She's gonna eat all those cookies?
那她也吃不了这么多吧？
Monica: Well, I want he baby to come out all cute and fat!
嗯，我想让小宝宝养的胖胖的。
Ross: So, why is Erica coming to visit?
Erica干吗要来这儿？
Monica: Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
我们想跟她再熟悉熟悉，还有…她没来过纽约，所以她想逛逛那些旅游景点，自由女神像啦，帝国大厦啦…
Chandler: Oh, those places! There's always so many people, their being corralled like cattle, and... you know, there's always some idiot who goes "Mooooo"!
哦，那些滥地方。那些地方的人总是挤的满满当当，跟被圈养的牛群似的。还有，那儿总是有些傻瓜学牛叫。
Monica: Well, if it annoys you so much, then why do you do it?
唔，要是那这么惹你烦，你干吗也那么做呢？
Ross: (looking at Rachel entering with Emma) Oh, hi! Hi! Thanks for showing you up thirty minutes late!
哦，嗨，谢天谢地，你才晚了30分钟。
Rachel: Ross...
Ross: No, no, no, I'm sure you have a great excuse, wh-was it a hair appointment, a mani-pedi or was there a sale at Barney's?
不用多费口舌，我肯定你有个好借口。是什么，美发预约？修指甲还是Barney's大降价？
Rachel: My father had an heart attack... (crying) ...while I was at Barney’s.
我爸爸得了心脏病… 在我逛Barney's的时候。
Ross: Oh my God.
哦，我的上帝。
Monica: Honey.
亲爱的
Chandler: I'm so sorry...
我很抱歉。
Ross: Is-is he ok?
他还好吧？
Rachel: Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated.
是的，他们说他会好的。但他还是得服药静养。
Ross: Ok, ok. I'm gonna come out to Long Island with you, I mean, you can't be alone right now.
好吧，我跟你一起去长岛，你现在不能就一个人。
Rachel: No, come on, I'm totally ok. (hugging him) I don't need you to come! I can totally handle this on my own.
不用了，我还行。我用不着你来。我一个人能撑得住。
Ross: Still-still, let me come... for me.
尽管如此，还是让我来吧… 就算是为了我。
Rachel: Ok. If you really need to.
好吧，如果你真的需要的话。
Ross: I bet someone could use one of Monica's freshly baked cookies.
我看吃点Monica刚烤好的饼干你感觉会好点。
Rachel: Oh, I really could.
哦，我还真想吃点。
Ross: Oh!
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe's trying to teach Joey French, so she's sitting in front of him with the script in her hands.]
【场景：中央公园，菲比正努力教乔伊法语，她手里拿着剧本坐在乔伊面前】
Phoebe: All right, it seems pretty simple. Your first line is "My name is Claude", so, just repeat after me. "Je m'appelle Claude".
好的，这看起来很简单。你的第一句台词是 "我的名字叫Claude。"
嗯，这个似乎很简单，你的第一句台词是我叫克劳德，那么，跟我念。
Joey: Je de coup Clow.
Phoebe: Well, just... let's try it again.
呃，我们再试一遍。
Joey: Ok.
Phoebe: Je m'appelle Claude.
Joey: Je depli mblue.
Phoebe: Uh. It's not... quite what I'm saying.
嗯，你跟我说得不太一样。
Joey: Really? It sounds exactly the same to me.
真的？我听着一模一样啊。
Phoebe: It does, really?
是吗？真的？
Joey: Yeah.
Phoebe: All right, let just try it again. Really listen.
好吧，我们再试一遍。仔细听着。
Joey: Got it.
好嘞。
Phoebe: (slowly) Je m'appelle Claude.
Joey: Je te flouppe Fli.
Phoebe: Oh, mon Dieu!
Joey: Oh, de fuff!
Monica: (entering with Erica and Chandler) Hey you guys.
嘿，伙计们！
Phoebe: Hi!
Joey: Hey.
Monica: I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica. And this is the baby!
我想要你们见个极特别的人。Phoebe，这是Erica，这是小宝宝。
Phoebe: Oh!
Monica: Joey. Erica, baby!
Joey: Hi.
Monica: Everyone. Erica, baby!
Chandler: Monica. Calm, self.
Monica，冷静点儿。
Erica: Thank you. It's really nice to meet you guys, I can't believe I'm here!
谢谢，真高兴见到你们。我都不敢相信来到这儿了。
Joey: Welcome to New York City! Or should I say "ghe deu flooff New York City"?
唔，欢迎来到纽约，或者我应该说…
Chandler: Why would you say that?
你干吗要说那个？
Phoebe: Ok. What are you gonna be doing today?
你们今天打算干什么？
Erica: I wanna see everything! Times Square, Coney Island, Rockefeller Center...
哦，我想看看所有的地方，时代广场，科尼岛，洛克菲勒中心…
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
哦，你知道你该干什么吗，你应该一路走到自由女神像的顶上。
Erica: Oh yeah, let's do that!
哦，对呀，我们去吧！
Chandler: Great! (to Monica) This baby'd better to be really good.
好主意。这个小宝宝得够结实才行。
[Scene: Hospital.]
老友记 剧本
上网搜一下就有的，我以前就下过，只不过忘记了地址。给你贴出来一点（第一季第一集）
The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot)
Originally written by Marta Kauffman and David Crane.
Transcribed by guineapig.
SCENE 1: CENTRAL PERK. (ALL PRESENT EXCEPT RACHEL AND ROSS)
MONICA: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
JOEY: C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!
CHANDLER: So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
PHOEBE: Wait, does he eat chalk?
(THE OTHERS STARE, BEMUSED)
PHOEBE: Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!
MONICA: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.
CHANDLER: Sounds like a date to me.
(CUT TO SAME SET)
CHANDLER: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realise I am totally naked.
ALL: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.
CHANDLER: Then I look down, and I realise there's a phone... there.
JOEY: Instead of...?
CHANDLER: That's right.
JOEY: Never had that dream.
PHOEBE: No.
CHANDLER: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. And it turns out it's my mother, which is very weird, because- she never calls me!
(CUT TO SAME SET. ROSS HAS NOW ENTERED)
ROSS: (MORTIFIED) Hi.
JOEY: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
MONICA: Are you okay, sweetie?
ROSS: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...
CHANDLER: Cookie?
MONICA: (EXPLAINING TO THE OTHERS) Carol moved her stuff out today. (TO ROSS) Let me get you some coffee.
PHOEBE: Ooh! Oh! (STARTS TO PLUCK AT THE AIR JUST IN FRONT OF ROSS)
ROSS: No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay? I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.
MONICA: No you don't.
ROSS: No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!
JOEY: And you never knew she was a lesbian...
ROSS: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?
CHANDLER: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (THE OTHERS STARE AT HIM) Did I say that out loud?
JOEY: Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?
(ROSS GESTURES HIS CONSENT)
JOEY: Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones!
ROSS: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!
(ENTER RACHEL IN A WET WEDDING DRESS. SHE STARTS TO SEARCH AROUND THE ROOM)
CHANDLER: And I just want a million dollars! (EXTENDS HIS HAND HOPEFULLY)
MONICA: Rachel?!
RACHEL: Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
WAITRESS: Can I get you some coffee?
MONICA: (POINTING AT RACHEL) De-caff. (TO THE GANG) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (TO RACHEL) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
RACHEL: Hi, sure!
ROSS: Hi.
(THEY GO TO HUG BUT ROSS' UMBRELLA OPENS. HE SITS, DEFEATED AGAIN)
(A MOMENT OF SILENCE AS RACHEL SITS; THE OTHERS EXPECT HER TO EXPLAIN)
MONICA: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
RACHEL: Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (TO WAITRESS, WHO HAS BROUGHT HER COFFEE)Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realised that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, he always looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (TO MONICA) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
MONICA: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
RACHEL: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue...
SCENE 2: MONICA'S APARTMENT (ALL PRESENT AND WATCHING A SPANISH SOAP ON TV)
MONICA: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.
RACHEL: (ON PHONE) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me!
CHANDLER: (RE TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants.
JOEY: I say push her down the stairs.
PHOEBE+ROSS+CHANDLER+JOEY: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! (SHE IS PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. THEY CHEER)
RACHEL: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
ROSS: You can see where he'd have trouble.
RACHEL: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
MONICA: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
RACHEL: Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybe I don't need your money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!
(CUT TO SAME SET. RACHEL IS BREATHING INTO A PAPER BAG)
MONICA: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things...
PHOEBE: (SINGS) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (RACHEL AND MONICA TURN TO LOOK AT HER)..bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...
RACHEL: I'm all better now.
PHOEBE: (GRINS AND WALKS TO KITCHEN. TO CHANDLER AND JOEY) I helped!
MONICA: Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life.
JOEY: (SITTING BESIDE HER) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
MONICA: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!
JOEY: What, like there's a rule or something?
(THE DOOR BUZZER SOUNDS. CHANDLER GETS IT)
CHANDLER: Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound.
PAUL: (OVER INTERCOM) It's, uh, it's Paul.
MONICA: Buzz him in!
JOEY: Who's Paul?
ROSS: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?
MONICA: Maybe.
JOEY: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
ROSS: He finally asked you out?
MONICA: Yes!
CHANDLER: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.
MONICA: Rach, wait, I can cancel...
RACHEL: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
MONICA: (TO ROSS) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?
ROSS: (CHOKED VOICE) That'd be good...
MONICA: (HORRIFIED) Really?
ROSS: (NORMAL VOICE) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
(A KNOCK AT THE DOOR. MONICA GETS IT; IT'S PAUL)
MONICA: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (THEY ARE ALL LINED UP NEXT TO THE DOOR)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
ALL: Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!
CHANDLER: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?
MONICA: (SHOWS PAUL IN) Two seconds.
PHOEBE: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.
ROSS: So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight?
RACHEL: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
ROSS: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (THINKS) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
CHANDLER: (DEADPAN) Yes, and we're very excited about it.
RACHEL: Well actually thanks, but I think I'm just gonna hang out here tonight..
ROSS: Okay, sure.
JOEY: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
PHOEBE: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
(AD BREAK)
SCENE 3: ROSS' APARTMENT (THE GUYS ARE ASSEMBLING FURNITURE)
ROSS: (SQUATTING AND READING INSTRUCTIONS) I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little whim guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.
(CHANDLER AND JOEY HAVE APPARENTLY FINISHED A BOOKCASE, BUT THERE IS A BIT LEFT OVER)
JOEY: What's this?
CHANDLER: I have no idea.
(JOEY CHECKS ROSS IS NOT LOOKING AND DUMPS IN IN A PLANT POT)
JOEY: Done with the bookcase!
CHANDLER: All finished!
ROSS: (CLUTCHING A BEER CAN AND SNIFFING) This was Carol's favourite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
JOEY: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
ROSS: You guys.
CHANDLER: Oh, man.
JOEY: You got screwed.
(CUT TO MONICA AND PAUL EATING IN A RESTAURANT)
MONICA: Oh my God!
PAUL: I know, I know, I'm such an idiot. I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. I mean, how clean can teeth get?
MONICA: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
PAUL: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her-
MONICA: -leg?
PAUL: (LAUGHING) That's one way! Me, I- I went for the watch.
MONICA: You actually broke her watch?
(CUT TO RACHEL IN MONICA'S APARTMENT, TALKING ON THE PHONE AND PACING)
RACHEL: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (STOPS TALKING; DIALS A NUMBER ON THE PHONE) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...
(CUT TO ROSS' APARTMENT)
ROSS: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
JOEY: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavour of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavours out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
ROSS: I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny.
CHANDLER: Stay out of my freezer!
(CUT TO THE RESTAURANT)
PAUL: Ever since she walked out on me, I, uh...
MONICA: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles?
PAUL: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation.
MONICA: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
PAUL: Isn't there?
MONICA: Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What were you gonna say?
PAUL: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (MONICA TAKES A SIP OF HER DRINK) ...Sexually.
MONICA: (SPITS OUT HER DRINK IN SHOCK) Oh God, oh God, I am sorry... I am so sorry...
PAUL: It's okay...
MONICA: Being spit on is probably not what you need right now. Um... how long?
PAUL: Two years.
MONICA: Wow! I'm glad you smashed her watch!
PAUL: So you still think you, um... might want that fifth date?
MONICA: (PAUSE)...Yeah. Yeah, I do.
(CUT TO RACHEL WATCHING 'JOANIE LOVES CHACHI')
TV: 'I, Joanie, take you, Charles, to be my lawful husband.' 'Do you take...'
RACHEL: Oh...see... but Joanie loved Chachi! That's the difference!
(CUT TO ROSS')
ROSS: (SCORNFUL) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you? Y'know, here's the thing. Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? (GAZES OUT OF THE WINDOW)
(CUT TO RACHEL STARING OUT OF HER WINDOW)
SCENE 4: MONICA + RACHEL'S APARTMENT. RACHEL IS MAKING COFFEE FOR JOEY AND CHANDLER)
RACHEL: Isn't this amazing? I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life.
CHANDLER: That is amazing.
JOEY: Congratulations. And while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelette or something... (JOEY AND CHANDLER TASTE THE COFFEE, GRIMACE, AND POUR IT INTO A PLANT POT) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...
(ENTER MONICA FROM HER ROOM)
ALL: Morning. Good morning.
(ENTER PAUL FROM MONICA'S ROOM)
PAUL: Morning.
JOEY: Morning, Paul.
RACHEL: Hello, Paul.
CHANDLER: Hi, Paul, is it?
(MONICA AND PAUL WALK TO THE DOOR AND TALK IN A LOW VOICE SO THE OTHERS CAN'T HEAR. THE OTHERS SHUNT MONICA'S TABLE CLOSER TO TO THE DOOR SO THEY CAN)
MONICA: I had a really great time last night.
PAUL: Thank you. Thank you so much.
MONICA: We'll talk later.
PAUL: Yeah. (THEY KISS) Thank you. (EXIT PAUL)
JOEY: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?
MONICA: Shut up, and put my table back.
ALL: Okayyy! (THEY DO)
CHANDLER: All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference...
RACHEL: So, like, you guys all have jobs?
MONICA: Yeah, we all have jobs. See, that's how we buy stuff.
JOEY: Yeah, I'm an actor.
RACHEL: Wow! Would I have seen you in anything?
JOEY: I doubt it. Mostly regional work.
MONICA: Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the Reruns' production of Pinocchio.
CHANDLER: 'Look, Gippetto, I'm a real live boy.'
JOEY: I will not take this abuse. (WALKS TO DOOR AND OPENS IT TO LEAVE)
CHANDLER: You're right, I'm sorry. (BURSTS INTO SONG AND DANCES OUT OF THE DOOR) 'Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..'
(EXIT JOEY AND CHANDLER)
MONICA: So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.
RACHEL: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.
MONICA: I know, he's just so, so... Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco?
RACHEL: Oh, yeah.
MONICA: Well, it's like that. With feelings.
RACHEL: Oh wow. Are you in trouble.
MONICA: Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to work and not think about him all day. Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work.
RACHEL: Oh, look, wish me luck!
MONICA: What for?
RACHEL: I'm gonna go get one of those job things.
(EXIT MONICA)
SCENE 5: IRIDIUM (JUST MONICA, WORKING)
(ENTER FRANNIE)
FRANNIE: Hey, Monica!
MONICA: Hey, welcome back! How was Florida?
FRANNIE: You had sex, didn't you?
MONICA: How do you do that?
FRANNIE: So? Who?
MONICA: You know Paul?
FRANNIE: Paul the Wine Guy? Oh yeah, I know Paul.
MONICA: You mean you know Paul like I know Paul?
FRANNIE: Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. Y'know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years.
(CUT TO THE GANG MINUS RACHEL AT CENTRAL PERK)
JOEY: (PERCHED ON THE SIDE OF THE SOFA)Of course it was a line!
MONICA: Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that?
ROSS: I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than 'to get you into bed'.
MONICA: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?
PHOEBE: All right, c'mere, gimme your feet. (SHE MASSAGES THEM)
MONICA: I just thought he was nice, y'know?
JOEY: (BURSTS OUT LAUGHING AGAIN) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!
(MONICA PUSHES HIM OFF THE SOFA. ENTER RACHEL WITH SHOPPING)
RACHEL: Guess what?
ROSS: You got a job?
RACHEL: Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing! I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.
CHANDLER: And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.
RACHEL: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off!
CHANDLER: Oh, how well you know me...
RACHEL: They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!
MONICA: How'd you pay for them?
RACHEL: Uh, credit card.
MONICA: And who pays for that?
RACHEL: Um... my... father.
(CUT TO THE GANG AT MONICA + RACHEL'S, SITTING ROUND A TABLE. ON THE TABLE ARE RACHEL'S CREDIT CARDS AND A PAIR OF SCISSORS)
MONICA: C'mon, you can't live off your parents your whole life.
RACHEL: I know that. That's why I was getting married.
PHOEBE: Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time.
RACHEL: Thank you.
PHOEBE: You're welcome. I remember when I first came to this city. I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison, and I got here, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windows outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel.
(A PAUSE)
ROSS: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...
MONICA: You ready?
RACHEL: I don't think so.
ROSS: C'mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,...
ALL: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... (SHE CUTS THEM ALL UP. THEY CHEER)
MONICA: Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You're gonna love it!
(CUT TO SAME SET. MONICA, RACHEL AND ROSS HAVE JUST FINISHED WATCHING A FILM)
MONICA: Well, that's it.
RACHEL: (TO ROSS) You gonna crash on the couch?
ROSS: No. No, I gotta go home sometime.
MONICA: You be okay?
ROSS: Yeah.
RACHEL: Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor. (MON SMILES) What?
MONICA: That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody. (STOMPS ON PAUL'S WATCH AND GOES TO HER ROOM)
ROSS: Mmm. (THEY BOTH REACH FOR THE LAST COOKIE) Oh, no-
RACHEL: Sorry-
ROSS: No no no, go-
RACHEL: No, you have it, really, I don't want it-
ROSS: Split it?
RACHEL: Okay.
ROSS: Okay. (THEY SPLIT IT) You know you probably didn't know this, but back in high school, I had a, um, major crush on you.
RACHEL: I knew.
ROSS: You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.
RACHEL: I did.
ROSS: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
RACHEL: Yeah, maybe...
ROSS: Okay... okay, maybe I will...
RACHEL: Goodnight.
ROSS: Goodnight.
(EXIT RACHEL TO HER BEDROOM. ENTER MONICA IN DRESSING GOWN, AS ROSS IS LEAVING)
MONICA: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?
ROSS: I just grabbed a spoon. (EXIT ROSS)
(CLOSING CREDITS)
CREDITS SCENE: CENTRAL PERK
JOEY: I can't believe what I'm hearing here.
PHOEBE: (SINGS) I can't believe what I'm hearing here...
MONICA: What? I-I said you had a-
PHOEBE: (SINGS) What I said...
MONICA: (TO PHOEBE) Would you stop?
PHOEBE: Oh, was I doing it again?
RACHEL: (WALKS UP WITH A POT OF COFFEE) Would anybody like more coffee?
CHANDLER: Did you make it, or are you just serving it?
RACHEL: I'm just serving it.
ALL: Yeah. Yeah, I'll have a cup of coffee.
CHANDLER: Kids, new dream... I'm in Las Vegas. I'm Liza Minelli-
END
求老友记中英文对照剧本，word版，谢谢！
101 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot-The Uncut Version)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
Joey: Come on, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!
Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?
(They all stare, bemused.)
Phoebe: Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!
Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.
Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.
[Time Lapse]
Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.
All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.
Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone... there.
Joey: Instead of...?
Chandler: That's right.
Joey: Never had that dream.
Phoebe: No.
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me.
Monica: And they weren't looking at you before?!
Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!
[Time Lapse, Ross has entered.]
Ross: (mortified) Hi.
Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?
Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...
Chandler: Cookie?
Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today.
Joey: Ohh.
Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.
Ross: Thanks.
Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)
Ross: No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay?
Phoebe: Fine! Be murky!
Ross: I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.
Monica: No you don't.
Ross: No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!
Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian...
Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?
Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?
Ross: I told mom and dad last night, they seemed to take it pretty well.
Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., "I'll never have grandchildren, I'll never have grandchildren." was what? A wrong number?
Ross: Sorry.
Joey: Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?
(Ross gestures his consent.)
Joey: Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones!
Ross: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!
(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)
Monica: Rachel?!
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Hi, sure!
Ross: Hi.
(They go to hug but Ross's umbrella opens. He sits back down defeated again. A moment of silence follows as Rachel sits and the others expect her to explain.)
Monica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
Rachel: Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee) Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (to Monica) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue...
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Monica: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.
Chandler: (imitating the characters) Tuna or egg salad? Decide!
Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me!
(The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one is holding her hair.)
Phoebe: If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off.
Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants.
Joey: I say push her down the stairs.
Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
(She is pushed down the stairs and everyone cheers.)
Rachel: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it's like, all of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.
Rachel: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
Rachel: Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybe I don't need your money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!
[Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag.]
Monica: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things... Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...something and noodles with string. These are a few...
Rachel: I'm all better now.
Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!
Monica: Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life. The whole, 'hat' thing.
Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!
Joey: What, like there's a rule or something?
(The door buzzer sounds and Chandler gets it.)
Chandler: Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound.
Paul: (over the intercom) It's, uh, it's Paul.
Monica: Oh God, is it 6:30? Buzz him in!
Joey: Who's Paul?
Ross: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?
Monica: Maybe.
Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
Ross: He finally asked you out?
Monica: Yes!
Chandler: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.
Monica: Rach, wait, I can cancel...
Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?
Ross: (choked voice) That'd be good...
Monica: (horrified) Really?
Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
Phoebe: What does that mean? Does he sell it, drink it, or just complain a lot? (Chandler doesn't know.)
(There's a knock on the door and it's Paul.)
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
All: Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!
Chandler: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?
Monica: Okay, umm-umm, I'll just--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...
Ross: A wandering?
Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds.
Phoebe: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.
(Monica goes to change.)
Joey: Hey, Paul!
Paul: Yeah?
Joey: Here's a little tip, she really likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot over and over and over again until it starts to get a little red.
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
Ross: So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight?
Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
Chandler: (deadpan) Yes, and we're very excited about it.
Rachel: Well actually thanks, but I think I'm just gonna hang out here tonight. It's been kinda a long day.
Ross: Okay, sure.
Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
Commercial Break
[Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change.]
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, the guys are there assembling furniture.]
Ross: (squatting and reading the instructions) I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.
(Joey and Chandler are finishing assembling the bookcase.)
Joey: I'm thinking we've got a bookcase here.
Chandler: It's a beautiful thing.
Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?
Chandler: I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
Joey: Which goes where?
Chandler: I have no idea.
(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)
Joey: Done with the bookcase!
Chandler: All finished!
Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-hey, if you're gonna start with that stuff we're outta here.
Chandler: Yes, please don't spoil all this fun.
Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
Ross: You guys.
Chandler: Oh, God.
Joey: You got screwed.
Chandler: Oh my God!
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating.]
Monica: Oh my God!
Paul: I know, I know, I'm such an idiot. I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. I mean, how clean can teeth get?
Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
Paul: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her-
Monica: -leg?
Paul: (laughing) That's one way! Me, I- I went for the watch.
Monica: You actually broke her watch? Wow! The worst thing I ever did was, I-I shredded by boyfriend's favorite bath towel.
Paul: Ooh, steer clear of you.
Monica: That's right. [Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is talking on the phone and pacing.]
Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look, look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel, but it isn't me, it's not me. And not that I have any idea who me is right now, but you just have to give me a chance too... (The maching cuts her off again and she redials.)
[Scene: Ross's Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture.]
Ross: I'm divorced! I'm only 26 and I'm divorced!
Joey: Shut up!
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
Ross: That only took me an hour.
Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
Ross: I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny.
Chandler: Stay out of my freezer! [Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are still eating.]
Paul: Ever since she walked out on me, I, uh...
Monica: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles?
Paul: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation.
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
Paul: Isn't there?
Monica: Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What were you gonna say?
Paul: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (Monica takes a sip of her drink.) ...Sexually.
Monica: (spitting out her drink in shock) Oh God, oh God, I am sorry... I am so sorry...
Paul: It's okay...
Monica: I know being spit on is probably not what you need right now. Um... how long?
Paul: Two years.
Monica: Wow! I'm-I'm-I'm glad you smashed her watch!
Paul: So you still think you, um... might want that fifth date?
Monica: (pause)...Yeah. Yeah, I do.
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is watching Joanne Loves Chaci.]
Priest on TV: We are gathered here today to join Joanne Louise Cunningham and Charles, Chachi-Chachi-Chachi, Arcola in the bound of holy matrimony.
Rachel: Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, they're all sitting around and talking.]
Ross: (scornful) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?
Joey: Great story! But, I uh, I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea--Angela--Andrea... Oh man, (looks to Chandler)
Chandler: Angela's the screamer, Andrea has cats.
Joey: Right. Thanks. It's June. I'm outta here. (Exits.)
Ross: Y'know, here's the thing. Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? (He gazes out of the window.)
[Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]
Commercial Break
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]
Rachel: Isn't this amazing? I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life.
Chandler: That is amazing.
Joey: Congratulations.
Rachel: Y'know, I figure if I can make coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.
Chandler: If can invade Poland, there isn't anything I can't do.
Joey: Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelet or something... (Joey and Chandler taste the coffee, grimace, and pour it into a plant pot.) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...
Monica: (entering, to herself) Oh good, Lenny and Squigy are here.
All: Morning. Good morning.
Paul: (entering from Monica's room) Morning.
Joey: Morning, Paul.
Rachel: Hello, Paul.
Chandler: Hi, Paul, is it?
(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear. The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)
老友记剧本中英文对照 S01E01
老友记剧本台词带翻译
每一次看完《老友记》后，都会有这样一些场景和台词在我的脑海中挥之不去。以下是我为大家准备的老友记剧本台词带翻译，希望大家喜欢!
老友记剧本台词带翻译(一)
1、Chandler: All right, there’s a nuclear holocaust, I’m the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
“如果核爆炸，世界上只剩我一个男人，你会爱我吗?”
钱德勒不停地问莫尼卡会不会爱他，答案都是否定的。你能想象几年后他们有那么幸福吗?
2、Joey: That’s right I stepped up! She’s my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, I’d pee on anyone of you!
乔伊白痴而感人的宣言：“如果你们需要，我可以在你们任何人身上尿尿。”
3、Ross: I didn’t know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didn’t finish the whole letter!
罗斯真的有些小气，作为男生承担这些责任又怎么了?过去听他讲“on the break”觉得好玩，现在越来越觉得这时的他可恨了。
4、Mrs. Geller: And the next time you cater for me, there will be nothing but ice in the freezer.
聚会上人们都喜欢吃莫尼卡做的东西，盖勒夫人终于承认了自己的女儿，说下次再也不会准备备用食物了。
5、Chandler: Oh, I just wanted to say, "Hey!"
钱德勒跑过好几条街，跌倒了无数次，只是为了跟女孩子说一句“hey”。可惜她是乔伊的女友，虽然她跟钱德勒更合适。
还是喜欢做一个会气喘吁吁的说“真巧”的男孩，不管我有多老，追着喜欢的女孩跑，永远是最美的心跳牵动的心跳。
6、Chandler: That I haven't stopped thinking about her since the moment I met her. That I'm so fantastically, over-the-top, wanna-slit-my-own-throat in love with her, that for every minute of every hour of every day I can't believe my own damn bad luck that you met her first!!
钱德勒说出对乔伊女友的真实感受：“从见到她的第一眼开始，我就不可救药的爱上了她，我疯了似的思念她，梦寐以求有她相伴左右。每一天每一小时每一分钟的每一秒里我都在痛恨自己为什么不能比你早认识她。”
7、Chandler: Oh, it wasn't a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talked to a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author's grandchildren.
钱德勒跑了许多家书店，问了许多书商，又给原作者的后人打了许多电话，才买到了很稀有的书作为生日礼物，但乔伊只买了一支能看时间的笔，所以，钱德勒只好跟乔伊互换了礼物。 越来越爱钱德勒!
8、Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just would've just stepped aside.
钱德勒如果早跟乔伊坦白自己对乔伊女友的感受，情况会好得多。
或者说，罗斯早跟钱德勒说这些话，情况就会好得多。
9、Joey: When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unit for like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking about how I let you down!
“我们家被抢劫的时候，我被关在橱子里，整整六个小时，我都在想我会害你多难过。”
10、Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!!
莫尼卡因为先后和理查父子约会受到指责，然后愤怒的揭短。是呀，六人中没有一个的人生完美，但他们都在快乐的生活;没有一个没犯过错，但他们都是最善良的。
11、Rachel: Don’t say that I have no sentiment! This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! This is from the museum from the first time we… were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter!
瑞秋让人动情的一刻：“不要说我没有人情味儿。这是我们第一次一起看电影的票根，这是你第一次为我做早餐时剩的蛋壳，这是我们第一次约会时从博物馆拿的化石。我可能会把你们送的礼物退掉，但我会保留所有我认为值得珍藏的东西。”
12、KATHY: you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm… Listen I don’t wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I can’t stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I don’t wanna be the cause of that. So, I don’t think we can see each other anymore. I’m gonna go to my mom’s in Chicago, I’m gonna stay there for awhile. I think this could’ve be something really amazing, but y’know this is probably for the best. Y’know? I’m gonna miss you. Good-bye
凯茜对箱子里的钱德勒所说的话：“你现在不能说话也好，这样我们的离别也不必那么难受。我不想做影响你们兄弟感情的女人，我没法眼睁睁的看着你们为了我互不理睬。所以我觉得我们还是不要再见面了，我会去芝加哥我妈那调整一段时间。我知道我们在一起会有多么幸福，但现在来看，分开才是最好的结局。你能理解吗?我会想你的。亲爱的再见。”
13、Phoebe: Yeah. That’s what you really want. Yeah, I don’t want to be the reason you’re unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I really don’t want to be the reason I’m unhappy.
菲比放弃了和莫尼卡的餐车，支持她去做大厨。因为那是莫尼卡真正想做的，委屈莫尼卡就是委屈她自己，菲比不想委屈自己……
14、Phoebe Sr: I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life.
菲比的妈妈对她说：我抛弃过两个孩子，我多希望当时有人能告诉我这是多么糟糕的事情，这使得我以后的日子每一天都在无尽的悔恨中度过。
15、Monica: 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, …7..…7…7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7…(mouths 7)!
无话不谈的老友，钱德勒的女友当晚跑过来跟莫尼卡致谢。
16、Ross: I’m having my lunch at this table, here in the middle. I’m having lunch right here, with my good friend Joey, if he’ll sit with me.
罗斯为了好朋友乔伊，在博物馆的午餐桌上发起了反对阶级歧视运动。
17、Phoebe: No, I’m really okay with this. Y’know why? ‘Cause look at them, and I made that, so… I know it’s gonna be like a million times harder to give up a baby but, oh my God, it’s gonna feel like a million times better, right?
菲比决定为弟弟和弟妹生孩子。虽然放弃孩子时会有十万分的难过，但看到弟弟弟妹高兴的样子，也会有十万分的幸福。全世界最伟大的姐姐。
18、Kathy: Acting! Chandler, this is my job! I’m-I’m playing a part in a play! How can you not trust me?!
Chandler: Well, you can understand, given how we started.
凯茜对钱德勒说你怎么能觉得我背叛你呢?钱德说那我们又是怎么开始的?
难以置信聪明、善良的钱德勒会说出这么伤人的话。永远不要揭爱人的伤疤，尤其是这伤疤是为你而结。
19、Joey: Well, suppose until the baby’s born I laid off it. No extra animals would die, you-you’d just be eating my animals.
菲比怀孕后很想吃肉，但素食主义的她很在意杀生。食肉狂人乔伊为了让她心安，自动戒肉直到小孩子出世，把吃肉的机会让给了好朋友。
20、Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monica’s photo albums, I mean you don’t do that if you’re just in it for two weeks.
这个女孩花整晚时间跟你的朋友聊天，问你以前的事儿，要你的影集看，你觉得这是一段短暂情缘的表现吗?
21、Rachel: It’s okay. Sometimes, things don’t work out the way you’d thought they would.
有时候，生活不像你想象中那么美好。
得悉罗斯要结婚，可怜的瑞秋，她总觉得他们可以分分合合，可一旦没有了合的可能，她才感觉到对方的重要。
22、Phoebe: So, did shopping make you feel any better about Ross?
购物能减轻你对罗斯的思念吗?
Rachel: Manhattan does not have enough stores.
美国的店铺显然不够多。
23、Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
“罗斯，你什么时候开始筹备的这场婚礼?”
Ross: I don’t know. A month?
“记不清了，一个多月前吧。”
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. That’s what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, w. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
“女孩子在五岁的时候就开始幻想她的婚礼了，她们要最完美的婚礼，最理想的地方，更重要的，她们想要一个真正懂得这场仪式对她有多大意义的人来托付终身。”
24、Rachel: Y’know what? No. It’s not over until someone says, "I do."
在他们正式结婚以前，我是不会放弃的。
25、Minister: Take thee, Emily...
Ross: Take thee, Rachel...
老友记剧本台词带翻译(二)
1、RACHEL: Honey, this will help. (hands him a tub of ice cream)
每次钱德勒陷入失恋的深渊，女孩们就会在他身边，喂他吃冰激凌，对他说贴心的话。对他的羡慕甚至远远超过了乔伊的艳遇。
2、Phoebe: Aw, honey it's not your fault, y'know this is who you are, and I love you, and I want us to be friends, and if I keep living here I don't see that happening.
菲比搬出莫尼卡公寓的理由。无论是朋友还是恋人，有时候，保持一点距离，不是因为不爱你，而是因为太爱你。
3、Joey: I'm not wrong! I wish I was.
乔伊看到詹尼斯和前夫接吻，开始怕伤害钱德勒，故意瞒着他。但眼见他越陷越深，不得不告诉他真相。“我没看错，我也希望我看错了。”
4、Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. They're like, they're like a family, and if, I was you , I know I wouldn't want to be the guy who stood in the way of that.
乔伊说如果他是钱德勒，他会放弃詹尼斯。因为詹尼斯和前夫有一个孩子，这是一个家，他不想做破坏家庭的人。玩世不恭的乔伊，如果有一天结婚，他的娘子一定很幸福。
5、Ross: It's okay if he bumps his head, kids bump their heads all the time, y'know, it was your first time babysitting, I figured you did the best you could.
Monica: You jerk! You know how much I love that kid!
Ross: Monica bang! Monica bang!
莫尼卡和瑞秋不小心碰了本的头，罗斯很大度，知道瑞秋尽力了。
罗斯骗莫尼卡说本被摔坏了，莫尼卡着急的样子，让我们觉得本真的很幸福。
还有兄妹俩打闹追逐的场面，很温馨。
6、Joey: All right, means that much to you, I'll let you have her.
兄弟之间最棘手的问题，喜欢同一个女人。真的要让的话，也要记得不要说“让给你”呀。
7、Joey and Monica: Merry Christmas!!
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, you're the best!
菲比因为老去的圣诞树要被切碎而伤心，朋友们买了一屋子快干枯的圣诞树庆祝 圣诞节 ，他们的节日往往都很不辉煌，但因为有了彼此，每次都特别开心。
8、Sarah: Really Mr. Geller, you don't have to do this.
罗斯不小心打伤了童子军小姑娘的腿，竭尽所能得卖饼干都没能实现她的愿望。在钱德勒的公寓里，他们布置成飞船的模样，钱德勒和乔伊推着转椅，罗斯手拖着地球仪。小女孩实现了愿望，笑得就像真的在飞船里一样。
9、Rachel: Honey, why is it hard, I mean we've been together for almost a year now?
“我们在一起都快一年了，你怎么还不信任我呢?”
Ross: Well, I was with Carol for like eight years and I lost her.
“我跟前妻生活了八年，她还是离我而去了。”
我们都觉得罗斯的嫉妒有些变态的时候，这句话突然让我们难过，并理解了他。他太在乎这段感情，所以才会这样疯狂。”
10、Rachel: Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two people love each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous.
真正相爱的两个人，根本不需要猜疑。妒嫉从来留不住感情，相反只会把心爱的人推得越来越远。我们理解了罗斯，不证明他的做法是对的。
11、Rachel: We should take a break. A break from us.
你相信吗?就为了应该谁道歉这样的小事儿，两个相爱的人就错过了七年?
12、Ross: (to Chloe) I like this song.
酒吧里，《with or without you》再次响起，罗斯忧郁地说：“我喜欢这歌。”而瑞秋在寂寞的窗前不停播着罗斯家的电话。
那首歌反复唱着：“and you give yourself away,and you give ……and you give yourself away.”
为什么要错过呢?为什么要放手呢?为什么不能妥协，为什么不能原谅，为什么不能珍惜呢?
13、Ross: I can't imagine, I can't imagine my life without you. (Both of them are starting to cry.) Without, without these arms, and your face, and this heart. Your good heart Rach, (drops to his knees and hugs her around her waist) and, and....
“我不敢想象，我的世界没有你会怎么样?没有你温柔的抚摸，没有你深情地凝视，没有你贴心的挂念，没有你使我赖以生存的爱。瑞秋，我们可不可以重归于好?”
Rachel: (crying) No. I can't, you're a totally different person to me now. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever.
“我很想，但是不能。你已经不是我爱过的那个罗斯了，因为那个罗斯绝不会做伤害我的事，永远不会。”
14、Phoebe: Y'know what, I can stay, I'm gonna stay.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in your grandmother' cab, but y'know what, I'll stay.
Monica: Noo! I'll stay. He's my brother.
瑞秋和罗斯分手后，约其他人去滑雪。发现了罗斯的孤独，大家争着留下来陪他，即使意味着要玩两整天无聊的飞镖。
15、Ross: Umm, candles, champagne, yeah anniversaries are great. Cause you know love lasts forever.
与瑞 秋分 手后，罗斯去前妻家串门，发现她正准备和苏珊庆祝周年。
“蜡烛，香槟，太棒了，因为，爱是一生一世的财富。”刚刚分手的罗斯说这话时特别让人难受。
16、Ross: Look, you guys, you guys should go. (Joey tries to say something, but Ross cuts him off.) You planned this all out, and I don't want to ruin it, so you guys should just go.
菲比的车在半路上没油了。罗斯大老远跑过去帮助他们，却无法与他们一起去滑雪。他说：“不用担心我，我会好好过。你们计划了这么久了，好好玩吧。”
然后目送朋友们远去，一人踏上孤单的回程(如果他能回的去的话)。
17、Ross: I need juice! People need juice!!
罗斯看到瑞秋和马克约会，心如刀绞，几乎抓狂。
18、Monica: Something wrong?
Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing.
罗斯将要回的小T恤又还给瑞秋，因为那是瑞秋最喜欢的睡衣。上帝，请告诉我，相爱的人为什么要分开?
19、Phoebe: Oh, it's so great to see you feeling like this!
乔伊说看着爱的人跟别人回家，感觉太难受了。怪异的菲比说我真为你高兴，言外之意是我们的小孩乔伊终于长大了，体会到了真爱的感觉。
20、Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what I'm saying is I should have considered your feelings before I went home with you that night.
I've recently learned what's it like to be on your side of it, and I'm sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye.
可爱的乔伊，在体会到被人甩掉的感觉后，一一打电话跟他的一夜情女伴们道歉，请求她们的原谅。做任何事情前，先要考虑好对方的感受。
21、Monica: (popping back up) Regular or decaf?
Pete: Ah, which ever is closest.
莫尼卡穿着旱冰鞋为男友拿饮料，问要哪一种。男友说要最近的那种。(因为他怕莫尼卡多走路 摔跤 )
22、Phoebe: Okay, well they are a huge responsibility, especially at this age. They require constant care. They-they need just the right food, and lots and lots of love.
菲比说养宠物需要很多责任感。 教育 小孩子又何尝不是呢?只有稳定的经济是不够的，你必须给他们源源不断的爱。
23、Chandler: If they can't find a home for her, they kill her! And I'm not gonna let that happen to little Yasmine!
由于牵扯太多精力，钱德勒去还宠物小鸡，却发现如果还回去小鸡就要被杀掉，于是他带着它回来了，还多带了一只小鸭。
24、Ross: Eh, Beause I knew that if I told you, you'd make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight.
罗斯要去电视台录节目，精心准备了一个下午。但当他发现瑞秋需要人陪着去医院，还是取消了节目的录制。
永远要搞清楚：在你的生命里，什么才是真正重要的东西。
25、Monica: Well then, y'know what? I care about you to much to watch you hurt yourself like this. So if you have to do this, then you're gonna have to do it without me.
白痴富翁，为什么人总要如此固执?他征服了商界、科学界，得到了世界上最美丽的女人，所以要去追逐体能的极限?他征服和得到的那些，他懂得好好呵护吗?
26、Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
“跟你分手是因为我很生你的气，并不是因为我能不再爱你。”
求老友记经典两人对话剧本，时间大概5分钟，上课表演用的
Monica: Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such a turn-on. You wanna...? (plays with her finger on Chandlers chest)
噢，你用乒乓球打败迈克真的太帅了。你想要……那个吗？
Chandler: You know, I'd love to, but I'm a little tired.
呃，我是想，不过我有点累了
Monica: I'll put a pillowcase over my head.
我会用枕套把头包住的。
Ross: Hey, what’s going on?
Chandler: Hey.
Ross: I found a note on my door, "Come to Monica’s quick, bring champagne and a Three Musketeers bar."
Joey: (grabbing the candy bar) Yeah I’ll take that.
Ross: What’s up?
Chandler: Monica and I are engaged.
Ross: Oh my God. (Hugs Chandler.) Congratulations.
Chandler: Thanks.
Ross: Where is she?
[Cut to Monica out on the balcony.]
Monica: (yelling at the top of her lungs) I’m engaged!!!!!! I’m engaged!!!!
[Cut back inside.]
Joey: Yeah, she’s been out there for twenty minutes, I’m surprised you didn’t hear her on the way over.
Ross: Oh, I thought it was just a kid yelling, "I’m gay! I’m gay!" Can I bring her in?
Phoebe: Oh no, let her stay out there. It’s sweet.
[Cut to Monica.]
Monica: I’m getting married!!!! I’m gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because I’m engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why don’t you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
[Cut back inside.]
Chandler: (To Ross) Okay, you get her in here. (To Joey) You bolt the door. I’ll be in the closet.
Opening Credits
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